You Know It
by leedakay
Summary: You know it's hard to let go of someone who had changed your life. Heh, might as well get used to it; he won't be here for a while. Mm, so what am I supposed to do now? Sit here and wait for him? Like I have a choice, right? Ichiruki. : Post ch. 423


**I was pretty bored when I was doing this. =/

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You know it's pretty hard letting go of something that had changed your life.

Sometimes it takes ages to completely forget about it but even still; a part of you will still remember that part of your life.

Maybe to some it's a significant something that had belonged in their life for an ample amount of time and maybe to others it's a feeling they get in their hearts when they're reminded of something. Either way; something or someone or even some people, at one point in life, has been an important part of your life.

For me it was a person. Regardless of what he had said about me changing his world, I couldn't help beg to differ.

It was he who had changed my world. The world I knew and lived for a hundred and fifty years were nothing compared to the world I had lived with him for a year. Just a meagre year and I've had everything about me change in a way... which was good I suppose.

But still, be it good or bad; I was still thankful that he had become a part of my life.

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You know it's pretty hard letting go of something that had changed your life.

But I had to. It was better that way because I couldn't bear to hurt myself anymore. Knowing that he could never see me again, knowing that he could never feel my presence again ripped my heart out.

Could you imagine how disappointed he was after seventeen months of my absence? You think it's that easy? 'Oh! Just pop into a gigai! Everything will be hunky-dory if you do that!'

That was bull. Do you know how much it hurt me knowing that he could never see me without a disguise? He could never sense if I was in danger again. He could never look me in the eyes again without seeing all the regret and the feeling of longing inside him I knew he carried right after he had found out he'd be losing everything he had worked for in the year. I knew, somewhere, somehow, he had mentioned the fact that he never took pride in what he did.

Being modest was never his thing. So I expected that to be the truth. After all, he never lied. He said that being able to have the power to protect his loved ones was enough for him. And he thanked me for that. He thanked me for stopping his rain, for being the shining light to his every darkness and all that.

But I, like him, never took pride in the fact that he had taken my presence in his life as a big impact. I never once told him that I was proud of myself for being able to cheer him up. No, but I did constantly tell him that I was proud of him and what he had achieved, mostly mentioning that he had done it himself.

Though I think he secretly knew it was because of me too. I shrugged that thought away. It didn't matter. What mattered was the fact that he was happy and contented at his efforts of achievement with what he had strived for.

So now, knowing that I couldn't be a part of that again hurt me. It did, terribly.

I hadn't shed a tear of course. It was far beyond me to cry for someone like him and I highly doubt he would want me to sob for him. I did, however, pull off that pathetic face.

As pathetic as it was, I couldn't help it. Saying goodbye was the hardest thing I could have done to him. It was horrible. My chest tightened and constricted, refusing to ease until I knew for sure he could never see me anymore. I knew that when he gazed up at the sky and back down to the place where I stood and yet, his eyes never met mine.

So knowing full well he couldn't see me, I had bid goodbye to the rest and left.

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You know it's pretty hard letting go of something that had changed your life.

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**END. Review please! and i'll love you forever. Besides, what do you guys think of this. I found this baby when I was bored at home sometime during June (LOL according to my laptop...)**

**right, bye!**


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